5 Ways to Control Your Anger and Find Peace

Often our perception of being spiritual or on a spiritual journey is that we’re supposed to be happy and full of positive energy all the time. The reality is, it’s completely unrealistic.

There are going to be times when no matter how hard you try to not let something bother you, it still manages to get under your skin and make you angry. Getting angry doesn’t mean you’re a terrible person; it’s completely natural for us to get angry. Anger is a natural human emotion that signals us when we’re trying to protect ourselves from what might be considered wrong-doing.

Anger can be an uncomfortable emotion to feel, but it’s a part of the human experience. Being able to transform our anger into compassion demonstrates our ability to remain spiritually grounded in uncomfortable situations. It’s never too late to learn how to control your anger constructively and find peace. Use these tips to help get your anger under control before your anger controls you.

Change your surroundings.

Sometimes, removing yourself from hostile environments and moving to a peaceful and more calm place can help you release anger. Having somewhere you can go to remove the heaviness of what’s bothering you creates room for reflection and clarity, so that you’re better equipped to handle a situation. Changing your surroundings will help clear out the negative energy your anger carries and allow you to re-center yourself as a spiritual being. Things such as going for a drive or taking a walk in nature are practical ways of doing this.

Practice controlled breathing.

How you’re breathing may be the last thing you’re worried about when you’re angry, but it can also help calm you down in the heat of the moment. When you feel yourself becoming angry, try isolating yourself for a couple of minutes to concentrate on calm and controlled breathing. Controlled breathing involves taking slow, deep breaths that you inhale from your stomach instead of your chest. Feel the universe filling you as you inhale and exhale three of four times. Focus on feeling the air as it moves in and out of your lungs. Breathe deeply through your nose and concentrate on your stomach as it rises. As you exhale, send this energy to all of the living things that surround you. Controlled breathing allows your body to calm itself instantly and provide relief during those difficult emotions. You will feel more connected to yourself and the universe, while also making room for spiritual awakening.

Learn your triggers and signs.

Learning what triggers your anger and signs of it makes it easier for you to stop yourself from having an outburst. When it comes to identifying your triggers, examine your life for people, places, or things that you find stressful. When we’re in a stressful situation, it can be hard to control our emotions, so recognizing those triggers will help avoid those situations. Signs that we’re getting angry can be easier to recognize because we can often notice changes in us physically. For example, your muscles may tense up, and you start to clench your teeth when you get angry. Other signs could be noticing that your breathing has sped up or become fidgety.

Reciting comforting or positive affirmations.

Comforting yourself with words of encouragement will make it easier to express your anger productively. Words of affirmation like “Peacefulness is within me” and “Everything will be okay,” can be used as calming tools under challenging situations. Comforting or positive affirmations will help shift you into the right headspace and opens the door for change. When it comes to choosing affirmations to use when you’re angry, think of words that will help eliminate something from your life or invite something new. Think of positive affirmations as a form of prayer. They can provide closeness with a higher power and help manifest the desires of your heart. It may also help to keep a list of phrases handy as a quick reminder before stepping into uncomfortable situations.

Write it down.

When you find it hard to say how you’re feeling, writing your feelings down on paper allows you to express anger creatively. By writing your feelings down, you can visually examine your thoughts and reassess the situation to respond out of reason and not anger. Writing creates room for higher levels of thinking to take place and gives your brain room to explore solutions to the problems you face. Another great benefit of writing your feeling down is the record you will develop over time if you are consistent. It will give you something to look back on as you continue to grow spiritually and remind you of previous insights you had in difficult situations.

Remember, the goal for addressing your anger is to control and release it, not suppress it. In psychotherapist Robert Augustus Masters’ book “Spiritual Bypassing,” Masters describes spirituality as deep work that is emotional in nature. We can’t reject or avoid the emotions we feel, including anger. When we suppress our anger, it tends to show through the things we do and the interactions we have with others. We have to be able to listen carefully to these emotions, honor them, and get down to the bottom of what’s happening in order to experience true peace in our lives.